By Shaving My Head I Broke Through One of My Many Beliefs — That I Need Hair to Be Beautiful. I Don’t
- Some people may not like it. But you know what? People don’t like a lot of things. What matters is that we do what we like, what we love.
After carrying my hair for 48 years on my head I decided to shave it. No, it’s NOT my birthday.
The other day, in my meditation I was led to let go. So I did. I finished my meditation. I did a little ritual of surrendering. I took a bowl. I lighted a fire in it with camphor and sage. I took a thick pad of Post-It notes. On each note, I wrote everything I don’t need. Things such as guilt, shame, worry, lack of clarity, fear, hopelessness, powerlessness, the influence of people who do not serve my highest good, the grip of power, judgment by others and myself, fame, money, etc., etc., etc.
I anchored all the things that l want and need. Ease, kindness, love, peace in my mind and on the planet, loving understanding amongst all human beings, ending violence against another human being and living being, an abundance of joy, wealth, self-love, people loving themselves enough to not harm others, happiness, time, clarity, clear direction, confidence, courage, connection with the higher power, etc., etc. I took a nice long bath. Got ready and went straight to a barber shop. I didn’t even have breakfast because I didn’t want to take a chance and change my mind.
I went to a barber shop and not my usual hair salon because I didn’t want my hairstylist to talk me out of it!
Trin, the barber asked me what kind of haircut I wanted and I told him that I wanted to completely shave my head. I also warned him not to talk me out of it. He didn’t care. I think some men are easy that way. You tell them what you want and they give it to you without questioning you.
And there it was. The clipper touched my scalp. And then there was no looking back. Trin was kind and gentle and told me I am gonna rock my new look. So kind!
I felt the detachment from something that I didn’t realize I have been clinging to. Something that had so much power over me. A bad hair day could have me worrying all day long. I don’t need to.
And here’s the thing. It felt GOOD. I broke through so many of my beliefs. I need hair to be beautiful was one of them. I don’t.
I did something scary. And it made me braver. Something inside me shifted.
I do not need validation or permission from anybody other than myself.
I felt the detachment from something that I didn’t realize I have been clinging to. Something that had so much power over me. A bad hair day could have me worrying all day long. I don’t need to.
There’s a spiritual meaning too. We aren’t defined by our physical attributes. Society, culture, haters, media, the beauty industry, etc. will tell us the exact opposite.
What I am learning is to dampen the outside noise so I can hear my own voice. Listen to what it’s saying to me. And then use it to live the purpose I am meant to live and if possible make a positive impact in this world. And be unapologetic about it.
Our voice matters.
And some people may not like it. But you know what? People don’t like a lot of things. What matters is that we do what we like, what we love, with the sole intention of being authentic. And not to show off or keep up with the Joneses or put others down or hurt others. And if people still do not like it, it is on THEM. Really.
We do not need anybody’s permission to live our lives as we want.
And every single day I remind myself just that.
And that’s when our life begins to transform. That’s when we can truly start living AND loving our life.
If you have reached this far, I want to thank you for reading! You didn’t have to but you did. So, thanks!
Dr. Mrinalini Garv is America’s exclusive career coach for South Asian professional women. A bestselling author, and multiple-time career changer, she has worked as a physician, leadership coach and business professor in world-renowned organizations. Having had to maneuver her career success without a mentor that looks like her or had experiences similar to hers, Dr. Garv has become that mentor to South Asian professionals to help them master their careers so they can achieve the ultimate success they didn’t even know was possible for them.